A list of comforts

November is hard! Take good care.

Friends —

It’s always a shock when the days wane into slivers of themselves and you find yourself in darkness by five, before the workday has ended. And it’s never easy to don your winter coat, knowing you won’t take it off until spring. So let me start by asking: how are you all? I hope you’re well, or well enough. This is my twenty-fourth November, and it hasn’t gotten any easier yet!

Meeting my niece Irwin, Eliza and Andrew’s new kitten.

Here, a list of recent comforts:

• Lighting candles every night. Taper candles, scented candles, all the candles. If the sky must darken so early, I insist upon cocooning myself in warm, low, amber light until I’m ready for sleep.

• Linguine burro e alici. Linguine with butter and anchovies. Teo doesn’t love anchovies, but I LOVE them, so this pasta is my new go-to when he’s out for dinner, like he was one night this week. My method: While boiling just enough pasta for one, I melt a couple of anchovies into a knob of butter in a skillet. I drain the pasta, then add it to the skillet and toss toss toss over low heat, splashing with reserved pasta water as I go, until the sauce has emulsified into a luscious thing that clings to the noodles. This time, I made homemade breadcrumbs with lemon zest and black pepper and sprinkled them on top to finish the dish. 

• Clean sheets.

• A visit from my little brother Malcolm and his girlfriend Devon. I so appreciated them making the trip to see us, and the apartment felt immediately lighter when they entered, giggly and excited about their New York weekend. One highlight was lunch together at Radio Bakery in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. The ham and rosemary butter sandwich on sesame stirato is a thing of beauty.

  

  With Malcolm in Greenpoint.

• Laughing. Teo and I recently had dinner with our friends Jan and Victoria, two of the biggest goofballs we know, and it was a gift to laugh our hearts out about who-knows-what-and-who-cares. Friends who make you laugh are priceless! Also, a quick shoutout to New Girl, the only TV show that unfailingly makes me laugh. It’s no small thing, knowing that you can turn something on and laugh every time, even on the worst days.

• A hot shower before bed.

• Visiting Eliza in Philadelphia for a single night. We dressed up in our best 70s garb and went to an ABBA-themed dance party at a bar. It was very silly and very fun.

  

  Eliza, ready for ABBA.

• Music. I had the privilege to attend a masterclass taught by the composer Adam Guettel the other day, and I left his studio feeling entirely inspired by his creativity. I also left feeling hungry to SING. Most people in my adult life don’t know of me as a singer, but I know within myself that I am one. I also know that I’m not singing nearly enough. I sing when I’m alone in my apartment, often sitting on the floor of my bathroom, where the acoustics are excellent, but it’s not enough. I want to sing like I did in high school: harmonizing with other singers, belting musical theater ballads, supported by a pianist, sharing original music in intimate circles of songwriters. How does one sing as an adult who isn’t pursuing music as a career? Enlighten me, please. (I suppose this one sounds more like a frustration than a comfort, but it’s the good kind of frustration, propelling me towards the musical life I desire.)

• Teo.

• A perfect pot of beans. There are weeks of butter-bathed scallops, and there are weeks of beans on toast. This week was the latter. Eliza is a member of the Rancho Gordo Bean Club, and gave me a couple bags of her latest delivery to take home to Brooklyn from Philadelphia. I immediately cooked a pot of pink beans with bay leaves and smashed garlic when I got home, and I’ve been eating them on toast as if my life depends on it. Divine.

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I’m taking next week off to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family in Vermont, but I’ll be back the following week with a new post. 

Stay warm out there! Love you all.

xx

Phoebe